An Advocate for True Love

An Advocate for True Love

Mylife experiences have been truly unique. And I'm not just saying that. So many things have happened that I never would have thought. I'm 23, and single, for one. My life plan involved being married a year ago. What else? I'm living in Pittsburgh, and I most definitely planned to be living somewhere way more glamorous. Life is such an interesting process. Years ago, I finally decided that I wasn't going to plan things anymore. I tried it for awhile, and then realized that my plans never came to life, in fact, most of the time, the opposite of what I planned happened.I have resolved recently, to be an advocate for love.

As I observe married couples in my life, I become more and more enthralled with the idea of living happily aver after. There are so many things about love that defy human nature. I'm not talking about lust, obsession or crushes, I'm talking about true selfless love. Love that is unconditional- love the protects, hopes and trusts. This is the love that I mean.The culture we live in does not understand love at all. From the time I was a little girl, I started to believe that love was a feeling. Warm fuzzies, walking on air, all those cliches. I watched sappy movies where a man and a woman meet, and five minutes later they danced. By the next week they had already triumphed over some huge problem (normally the girl is poor and a waitress, the man is rich and a CEO. Their worlds don't mesh clearly) and were walking down the aisle of a beautiful church with their friends and family smiling happily at their great fortune. They "loved" each other and would live in a state of euphoric bliss for all time. Even then, I would often wonder what happened after the wedding, reception and honeymoon came to a screeching halt.Then I would often wonder why so many people end up in failed relationships and marriages. What happens to a couple that takes them from glowing newlyweds to seething enemies who can't stand to be in the same room together? This question is what made me to internally decide to become an advocate for true love.

I believe that God designed all of us with a void in our lives. This void is the "God-shaped hole" we were taught about as children in Sunday school. It is meant to be filled by God's true and unconditional love, yet so many people try to fill it with other things. I continually find myself filling my time with meaningless activities, wondering why some days I feel so listless and alone. Those are the days the God-shaped hole is blatant and glaring. I am thankful for those days because they make me aware of my need for Him. I think the number one thing people replace their need for God's unconditional love is relationships with others. Why do you think it is so difficult when a relationship ends? Most people have invested so much of their time and emotions into that relationship, and when it ends, that investment is gone. In my own life, I made this exact investment. I allowed a relationship to become the replacement for God in my life. I never sat down and decided for this to be the case- It was a gradual process that built up and built up until God was merely an afterthought most of the time. It's an easy thing to happen, instead of praying when I was upset or confused, I called upon my relationship to offer advice and guidance. When I had exciting news of a new job, a new addition to my family, it was easy and natural to share it with my significant other. Years passed, and then one day it was plain over. There was no debating that fact. I cannot describe the pain and anguish I felt, and the person I normally went to for love and comfort was no longer apart of my life. That is when I realized that I never wanted to be in that position again. I realized how foolish I was to rely so heavily on anyone other than God. He was there for me all along, and especially when I desperately needed Him. I share that personal story only to illustrate how common the mistake of replacing God's true love for any other thing.

What is true love? True love is a young engaged woman who decides to go through with her marriage even when her fiancee comes back from Iraq permanently disfigured, paralyzed and dependent on his betrothed to care for his every need. This is true love.True love is the little elderly couple who awake daily and pray for God to strengthen their marriage. They walk along the neighborhood streets,hand-in-hand, conversing easily and freely about their children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren. She gazes at him adoringly, and he holds the door open for her as they enter their home. This is true love.True love is a mother bathing her newborn son. The love in her eyes makes her glow and a smile come to her face. For the first time, he smiles back at her. This is true love.True love is a young man, a carpenter, spending time with His twelve closest friends. As they sit in a boat on a sparkling river, He teaches them principles that revolutionize their lives. One by one, these friends leave His side, each of them made a better by Him. As He hangs on a cross He lifts his eyes to heaven and prays, "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do." This is true love.It finally hit me. Love is the least complicated thing in the world. It's not a back- and-forth roller coaster ride with emotional ups and downs. It's not a physical attraction or an electric spark. It's a commitment of will, it's giving selflessly and expecting nothing in return.

It's what makes me want to be an advocate of true love.