Natures Attack

Today didn't start any less normally than any other day in my typical life.

I woke up to the ANNOYING sound of my alarm clock, hit snooze several more times than I should have, and finally got out of bed to take a shower. I turned the water on, let it run and got in. Suddenly, out of NOWHERE, a million-i-pede starts crawling up the shower towards me a mile a minute. Needless to say, I panicked!!! I tried to aim the shower head nozzle towards the bug to make it drown (do bugs drown?), but this bug was invincible--it knew how to swim!! I scared it off enough with the water, or so I thought, so I took the fastest shower of my life, all while looking to see if the bug would make a second appearance. I thought I had made it home clear until I saw some movement through the clear shower curtain. I ofcourse I panicked again,jumped out of the shower and went for some bleach spray under my sink. The milli-pede swam down the drain.

Nature:0 Jaime:1

Later than day at work, I was taking a late lunch break and decided to enjoy the beautiful fall weather and eat outside. I was talking to a colleague and suddenly, I feel a very distinct feeling, like something was pinching my tongue very hard. I touch my toungue to see what was piching me, and out I pull a bee! A BEE STUNG MY TONGUE. Since I was mid-conversation, I did what any normal red-blooded American would do, I continued on while mentioning non-chalantly, "Oh, a bee just stung my tongue." And ofcourse, I continued talking for ten more minutes, all the while my tongue is throbbing and i'm imagining that it is swelling up to be the size of my fist. I start thinking about how my air circulation may be cut off at any moment, and excuse myself from the conversation i'm in the middle of. For the next 5 hours (and counting) my mouth and entire left jaw is throbbing, I can't talk, eat or do anything because my whole face is killing me, all because if a tiny bee sting.

Nature:1 Jaime:1

Because I could not see straight because if the pain flowing through my body, I decided to leave work a little early and go home, take some Benadryl and suck on ice for the rest of the day. I am driving home and I feel a little tickle on my hand. I look down only to discover a yellow spider the size of a quarter, maybe a half dollar, happily making its way accross my hand.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I have not had this many nature encounters in YEARS- in fact, I can't ever recall a time in my life when I had to fight off nature in this way! I was so freaked out by this spider that I nearly swerved into oncoming traffic. I cleverly trapped the spider in the folds of my shirt, and as soon as I got home, took of my shirt and soaked it in scalding hot water.

Nature:1 Jaime: 2

I am exhausted, this blog is ridiculous, but I just had to share my day with you- I can't even believe this all happened in one day....

Augh, my mouth is killing me.